Monday, April 27, 2009

Questing

For those of you who actually read this, I am sorry I have been away. Life has been a bit crazy... company - we had a wonderful visit from the matriarch of Hubby's family, a wonderful and kind person who is my role model for how I would like to be when I am older; confirmation - yes she wore a skirt & even read in the mass, a lovely evening; we had (still have)car problems - yuck! We had blah blah blah - life has just been crazy - primarily in good ways, so I am not complaining.

Writing about our quest to find Son's illness and cure is difficult. It was/is a long journey with many lows and highs along the way. When Son reached kindergarten, which is all day here, he began to receive frowny faces on his daily charts. This was not a total shock, here I mention what a talker he has always been. But, I decided to be proactive, make an appt. with the teacher and get to the bottom of the issue. She was nice, and we began a relationship - err I guess. As my sister pointed out I was showing that we were involved more than looking for an answer, as the problem was a fairly typical kindergarten issue - chatty.

Eventually, Son was placed on a special daily report sheet and by Christmas he was not at a table with other students, but sitting in a desk alone. What offense had caused Son to be separated from the pack? Well: he answered without raising his hand, he played with his pencil and scissors during instruction, he rocked in the chairs. At one conference she actually brought 2 of his pencils that he had chewed beyond all recognition - she was very upset, I thought it was funny. Son reported that he had to do those things because, "all she does is talk talk talk."

I was agreeable and polite.

First grade: More of the same. All the teachers and staff agreed he was a "very sweet and smart boy." But, he continued to be separated from the pack. You know the kid who has his name said every 15 minutes or so. The one that you don't want to be caught playing with, or the teacher might see that you're not perfect too. This was the year he began to be sick - a lot. Headaches, stomach aches, anything nonspecific that would possibly keep him home. He actually threw-up at parent drop-off. More meetings, more of the same. He is up and down. We don't think he is ADHD, but there are issues every day. What issues? talking, yelling out the answers, off task during teaching, finishing his work (too fast) and going under the table, pulling on his clothes, rocking in his chair....

I was agreeable and polite.

This was the year, I thought "boo-hoo. I teach middle schoolers who call out the answers, don't sit still and tune out lessons - BIG DEAL!" But, he was miserable daily - so: I asked for an evaluation for hypersensitivity disorder by an OT. After all this was a child who would scream as if you were pulling out his finger nails when you were trimming them. A child that had pre-k teachers that asked me to buy Velcro shoes, because he would need his laces fixed (and perfect) 15 times a day, who than fixed his socks incessantly. It fit, but no go - post evaluation, he showed definite markers, but not enough to treat.

Second grade: ENOUGH I thought. we are not spending another year in misery...(yeah right)

6 comments:

  1. I look for your blog every day. Enjoy it and love hearing what you and kids are up to. I hope you are enjoying mine.

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  2. I'm glad you enjoyed the visit with the matriarch. As far as the quest for your son's diagnosis, I don't envy you. It has to be painful. You are a good parent for keeping up the search. Good luck.

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  3. Isn't it nice when teachers go out of their way to actually help a child who is struggling in the classroom as opposed to putting them off to the side so they don't have to deal with him. Oh, I guess you wouldn't know.

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  4. ~kathy: you weren't showing on my blog list - but I fixed it!!

    ~surprised: it was a great visit! thnks!

    ~weasel: nope - haven't had that experience for myself - but i give that experience to my students all the more zealously!

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  5. man, i wish i coulda been there to visit w/the matriarch! i had so much fun staying at her house in chi-town! she's a really cool, active, funny lady who doesn't act anywhere near her age :)

    i think you already know how i feel about your quest and the teachers you've dealt with, but i really liked wM's comment. too funny (but unfortunately accurate).

    oh, and sorry i'm so behind in reading you, but if it makes you feel better, i haven't read ANYbody's blog in over 2 weeks!

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  6. I'm here to make Nonna look good since I am what a month behind?

    Being the kid no one wants to play with totally sucks. Cheryl (youngest sister) and I were both that kid in elementary school. Cheryl had some behavioral issues, they labeled her ADD. My mother worked very hard to try and help her, some of her teachers did too and that I think really made a difference academically. Socially she did not blossom until high school after I graduated and she got adopted by a very sweet girl who decided to give her a chance. I hope the same has happened or happens for Boy!

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